It's psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I'll get a saw

When life gives U lemons, take some tequila & salt & shot glass & slam one back!! I need something stronger than lemonade !!


There are funeral hats, bday hats, clown hats n so forth.but the most tiresome i found in my experience was the Chef's hat.
I substituted as a waitress at a get-together a while back, when the papparazi clicked away to glory!!
I aint a chef!! There, it’s out in the open!! I cook & experiment only on my family and friends as witnesses will testify!
On returning from India in feb, I hired a cook/maid to help get my laziness back in shape and size!!
Maid 1
She wasn’t from my part of the state, so, she didn’t know how to cook our stuff, our way. & apparently, she didn’t know to cook vegetables either! She actually cuts the drumsticks in half, scrapes off the mid portion!! Y would anyone do that to a drumstick?? There's bird flu threat here, so, I never bought chicken or egg & I didn’t dare try out her fish!!
So, v silently suffered for a month!
Next maid was the maid 1's roomate, apparently a keralite.
Reasons y maid 2 didnt make the cut...
She couldn’t speak Malayalam & her English was broken. She didn’t know how to cook basic mallu food. She then proceeded to make drumstick curry and ladies finger curry in the srilankan style! It was the day ‘Srilanka’ defeated ‘India’ at the ‘World Cup’!
Turns out she’s a Srilankan, stayed in Kerala for a month. Her roommate never figured it out!! I have nothing against Srilankan food, honestly! I’ve never had it before to compare it with. But for some reason, its all Yellow! Be it the curd curry, the potato fry, the ladies finger curry, the white potato stew or a brown chicken curry or white pulao! All YELLOW!!
Mom’s come, so Good food on go again, but turns out I cant eat a few of the items!!

"When Life gives U lemons, wing it right back and add some lemons of ur own"...Calvin

i, Hereby Bequest...

On Aug 2nd1990, when the country was being invaded, all it meant to me was that I couldn’t go for my swimming classes. So, if I were to drown in a Puddle, Pond, Lake, Sea or an Ocean, U know Sadam Hussien’s to blame!!
When I was in 12th, the rumors had sprung up of bio-chemical war. Our house was the only one which didn’t have a sealed room with black taped windows. I remember panicking one day and packed all my belongings into a single draw, which would b easy to take if the war broke out!! The only positive thing was that v might have had to write our board exams in Russia!!

Now, the rumors are alive again !! Obviously, I cant delve into the matter or they’d b arresting me, deporting or worse, ban blogging here!!

So, i'll just go about my business and make my Will, though most of my belongings are here with me, naturally!! So, out wit a few of my prized possessions.

• My Harvey’s Bristol sherry is to be taken by Anju, who can share with Kavitha if the need arises for Anju!!
• Video & Audio casstees to be thrown.
• Books open to any takers. Danielle Steel’s ‘Jewels’ to Kavitha, as she hates it or return 2 Divya!
• Albums to be sorted n each one can take their own embarrassing snaps or burn it along with my letters and cards. Wedding album to my in-laws.
• My sarees, jewels to my sister, which she will take anyway.
• My money to be divided by my 2 little brothers, to buy Video Ipod, get the bike fixed n roaming & a Lamborghini or two!!
• With the money in my bank, please get me the 7th Harry porter novel and bury it in my memorial[I better Have 1]( without whispering the story 2 me).
• Get the baby slam books for all my pals when they become new mothers!!
• & Anju, hey, I got u a sphinx candle statue which I couldn’t give then, so please take it!!
• Kavitha, take "something blue" from whatever is left behind for ‘ something blue, something old, something borrowed’ 'something new' I already gave u.

Thats all for now!!

Blogged out, Blocked Up, but Back !!

I am neither Lazy nor Concussed as I like to think I am (or wish), but
My attention span is like a snowflake in an avalanche!
So, Blog = me in Dreamland ! ( which explains the whereabouts of my blog for So long)
Now, New Me= creative + animated = U going crazy!

Animation, Here I Come

Cheffing it Up

Yohoo Waitress !!

That's another hat i donned on last week... People cant seem to accept that joblessness is more than just fine for me !!
It was a BBQ night...dad's alumini...he's the prez, so v were hostin it. Ofcourse next day, i went n got myself sexy flat sports shoes !!

Someone's got to do it !!

I have done a few such, some I like, but some I dont.
My aunt works for a research company. I agree to checking out food joints, mostly coz its free mealz! There's also pre sales meals to c if it'll pull thru...that's fun. That's when I had milk shake wit a 8inch burger...it actually tasted good.
But wat I did last week was like a snitch's job...I went to a company to give an online test on Cisco...Yeah,I dont kno wat Cisco is...and needless to say,I flunked magnanimously, but they evaluated my technical skill to 35% n plannin n implementin to 21%.. so it wasnt a complete waste. The worst was that I had to rat on the administrator who was a real cutie.
Ofcourse my worst was callin up people and askin if they like travellin via Kuwait Airways. I actually managed to call 30 people!

Breathe Out CO2

HUMAN BODY ANATOMY !!

Brain,Lungs,Heart,Arms,Butt,Legs !!

Its simple, really...just make sure to breathe in Oxygen, breathe out CO2 !!

There r so many horrible deaths happening here...
A dad was drivin his 2kids 4 a chess tournament.He ran a signal n a bus crashed into the car, the passenger side was well... not there.The boy, a 9yr old, died that day,the girl went in2 coma,dad a few scrapes,else fine.parents went wit the boy's body 2 india 2 do the rites,then the mom returned.The girl died a week later of extensive brain damage.their only kids! A malu lady doc won a nbk draw n won a slk bmw car,sold it 4 20,000kd.Later on, her kid,3yrs or less,met wit an accident which shattered his face.but he's ok after many operations.Then, sometime on...Her husband n kid went sight seein around the pool area of their new building. A man passin by later, saw the kid wanderin alone by the pool, pointing towards the pool. His dad was lying inside...he was brain dead n soon after he died.Only 40 yrs of age!! So smile,breathe and b a survivor!!!!!!!

germany!!!! snow!!!!me not there!!!!me another continent!!!!cant write any stories!!!!no philosophies either!!!!no capitals,no complete sentences!!!!but severe headaches!!!! ENJOY